POETRY

I LEFT YOU STANDING WAITING FOR THE TRAIN

I left you standing waiting for the train
Your shirt, wrinkled from troubled sleep
The party the night before
A different time
Place.
How is it that you make the rules?
And have the authority to break them at will?
I gave you my bounty
You tasted me
The watershed of my soul;
But I will not be devoured
Left to crumble
In your wake.
I only promised once to be your island
And you to be my sea
Surrounding me with your tempest,
Your tenderness,
Passion.
I recall your face in the candlelight the night before
Telling me about your father
Your turmoil
Inner rage
Your unconditional love.
I loved you in that moment.
You ravaged me later
I drank of you
Greedy with desire.
It felt like only moments passed between us those days.
I left you standing waiting for the train
And then it rained.
And I lost you while you sped away down the tracks
Rocking you in and out of your repose
Your thoughts, where?
In my fitful daylight sleep
Trying to reclaim myself
I listened to the rain and
I heard the train.

FOR MY UNBORN GRANDDAUGHTER

Our little sparrow was to come in the spring.
Then one winter day, a message
As clear as a picture
Said she wouldn't be able to come.
Snowflakes melted on the cheeks of the white hot sand that day.
Tears like honey dripping from the eyes of my daughter with life alive in her belly.
Tears to overflow the sea, longing for this little bird;
Longing for her,
Before she could even fly away,
Unnamed, back from where she came.
Angels welcome her while arms on earth remain empty, wanting, all but broken.
Shhh.
Whist.
Silence now.
Sing her home in your heart

MY ANGEL FELL LAST NIGHT

WINNER OF 77TH ANNUAL WRITER'S DIGEST COMPETITION

My angel fell last night.
There was a monsoon and she tumbled off the balcony
into the yard below.
Her face broke off and her wings got bent.
I remember when she came to me
You brought her
It was an accident you said
One that was supposed to happen
So not really an accident at all
My neighbor brought her up to me in the morning
I glued her back together again
but she'll never really be the same
Perhaps she was trying to fly away to find you
And bring you back to me
I'd like to think that's what happened
But really..
It was just a monsoon.

I WANT YOU TO KNOW

I want you to know the ocean
And I want you to know snow too
But I want you to know that once
You had a little sister
Who couldn't come to know you
She couldn't come to come
Once there was a time that little sisters were secret
And never meant to be known
Mothers had to pretend they never existed
Mothers had to be sad alone
But you will someday know
That you had a little sister
Who was wanted and
Loved for the shortest time
Loved for all the ways that you are loved
I want you to know many things
The rain and the mud
The snow and the sand
The sun and the sky
The what and the why
But I want you to know
Your mother said goodbye
To a little sister.

I LOOK FOR YOU EVERYWHERE

I look for you everywhere
And sometimes
I see you.
Seeing you is believing
You are alive,
And not the ghost of my darkness:
Where I smell the sea
And it is your hair
Where I hear the birds
And it is your voice
Where I feel the dampness of the night
And it is your mouth.
And then I see you
And I know you are not these things.
In the night
I reach out to touch you
And I only touch myself.

THE DEAL

I traded my insides.
I took my guts to the pawn shop.
I laid them on the counter.
The broker said
They're not worth much.
He placed them on a shelf marked
NOT FOR SALE.
I was gutless.
There was nothing left inside.
I filled up the hole with bitter beans.
A small beast grew inside me.
Some days it would grow and try to escape.
Other days it would curl up and sleep.
Or it ran around in vicious circles.
I fed it bitter beans to keep it satisfied.
The pawnbroker called me.
Come and get your insides, they're taking up space.
You'll have to buy them back.
I paid for my guts with wonder.
I troubled how to replace the small beast and get my guts back on the inside.
I stopped eating bitter beans.
The wee beast left in the night.
He promised to come back and visit.
I choked down my guts.
When I was full,
I vomited.
Up came my pride.

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Two Friends

Two friends
Went for a ride on their ponies
To Aquini.
They brought with them their rum
And their dreams;
They also did bring a little pipe
To keep their dreams in.
They saw the wild horses on the horizon
But chose to only watch the dance;
Being settled in their ways
And afraid to follow.
They crossed the sparkling river
Looking to the east --
The moon;
The west --
The sun,
Waving farewell and hello.
Two friends
On a journey of promises.
Wiping one another's tears
Of joy
Of sorrow.
A shoulder here,
A leg up there,
Giving each other a hand.
Two friends
Following visions;
Mountains of trepidation
Oceans of doubt
Heavens of hope
With twinkling stars of anticipation,
Warm their hands by the fireside of companionship.
Sleeping under the lightness of dark,
The blankets of wishes.
Waking to the dawn of realization
On the cusp of loyalty.
Two friends
Went for a ride on their ponies
To Aquini.

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